Don’t Fool Yourself by Leading Co-Dependants

I have long posited the notion that the test of true leadership is whether or not you can lead volunteers. I won’t go into detail now on why I believe that statement is true. There is not enough time or space to cover my thoughts in a blog, that topic is for my future book (if I ever get around to it.)

But, I do want to address the one caveat to my premise – co-dependants. Co-dependants by nature will do anything to please you, or, as in my NFP (faith based) world, God. Even if God isn’t asking for this level of validation of their commitment to Him.

Co-dependents come in all shapes and sizes and will often go to many levels of sacrifice to obtain your approval, or, some self imposed ideal of what God requires of them.

How then do you tell if you are a leader or just have a group of co-dependants following you?

1) Realize that we are all crazy (co-dependant), but some of us are crazier than others.
2) Ask your friends – your true friends.

If you don’t have any friends to ask – consider yourself crazier than most and if you are leading, it’s probably just a group of co-dependants.

So as a touch point, be wise enough to look at the folks tagging along – are they emotionally healthy? If so, you might just be a leader.

Rabs

Open Door Leadership

A few years ago I engaged in an enterprise level software installation for a large not for profit organization.

I headed into the project with a team of folks with the intent of helping them finish the project. I ended up taking over the installation and thus had the perk of an office from which to function.

The environment was somewhat formal and was the typical cube structure.

My leadership style was much less formal and driven by conversation and relationship, what some call “walking the floor” leadership. But cubes are cubes and not very conducive “walking to walking the floor.’

What to do? I added some incentive for them to come into my space. I added a large bowl of candy on my desk and everyone that glanced at that bowl as they walked by I invited in for a small tasty sugar morsel.

I’ve continued this practice whenever possible and it has proved invaluable for my style of leadership – lots of conversation and relationship. As I have gotten older I have moved to healthier snacks – but the principle remains.

Open door, snacks, conversation, relationship… leadership.

Rabs